By Marb Sagarino
CFC SFL Pasig
This long delay, I have baptized with the name “procrastination,” which, co-incidentally (or not), also happens to be my number 1 enemy. I figured, there were a number of submitted reflections already regarding the event, so why bother? Mine might just be an echo of their written sharing. Hence, the procrastination. And yes, I do have more excuses to come up with a long, second paragraph to expound on my excuses.
You see, I’m a woman of excuses, i.e., “I’m too busy–tweeting–I mean, errrr, working.” But I tweet about God, and faith, and love, and Catholicism! That doesn’t sound too bad, right?
It was back in October 2012 (shucks, so last year) when I had the chance to partake in a one-of-a-kind experience with the household servants of CFC SFL, even though I myself, wasn’t a servant then (or now even). You may call me “epal,” by all means. Those epal days were probably THE most extraordinary yet highly existential experience in my membership to the community. Tell me: How often do you get a tap on the shoulder from someone asking you to divulge your life’s story?
I shared back then how I got to meet Christ, live Christ and hopefully continue to share Christ. Operative word: hopefully. Kuya Jepoy mentioned then that we are called to evangelize, to be “fishers of men,” because if we don’t fish, we fight. Today, in as much as I would love to tell you that I’ve come a long way since October, I’m afraid I can’t–the paradox of knowing you’ve been doing more but the fruits of your labor seem futile. I am in a fight with my own self, my number 1 enemy, procrastination.
But every so often, when God sees me slumped, like a CAT officer, He rahrahs “Get back up! Do not forget the Paraclete, my very own Spirit!” And along with this is the ringing reminder from my very own household head to always ask for His grace. Always.
I have no plans of telling you how “in-the-moment” I was back in October, what with the laughter and tears coupled with cold, sweaty palms in a freezing Baguio weather. Needless to say, it was a surreal moment, one which I will probably not be able to duplicate. I was very certain of one thing though: while I knew how to start off my sharing back then, I didn’t know how to end it. More often, I talk in verses, with a broken-up thought process. But the Paraclete was at work during that moment, it was as if it was His very own vocal chords delivering those lines, tying them up to form a solid story.
So for the past two and a half months when I’ve been thinking of how to put everything down in writing, I had no idea that I’d do it today–the Day after Jesus’ Baptism, the day when He tells his first disciples to follow Him and He would make them “fishers of men,” the Monday of the First Week in Ordinary Time 2013. And just like his first disciples, I would like to once again leave my nets and get back up to follow Him.
My dear friends, may we always allow ourselves to be tapped on the shoulder, be called, and leave our excuses behind.
Happy New Year!
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