CFC SFL District of Antipolo
Every person in the world has their own story to tell. Every person has their own conflicts in life. This is mine:
I grew up in a Christian family. My parents are both in the community. They introduced me to God. I knew God and believed in Him even at a young age.
Growing up, I began to see the world. I saw all the temptations and the reality of life. Sadly, it blinded me from following God.
I had an 8 year relationship with this guy. He was my friend and my highschool classmate. The first 4 years of this relationship was heaven, the last four was hell. Somewhere along the relationship, I realized I treated him as my own personal God – worshiped him when I should have worshiped Jesus Christ. I obeyed everything he said. I asked for his mercy and forgiveness whenever he claimed that i wronged him.
I was hurting but I stayed in the relationship. I was too afraid to be alone. There was even a time that I almost committed suicide because of him. I loved him so much and I thought accepting everything he does was part of the deal. I tried to introduce God to him, but I did not try to change him. For me, I love him the way he is and he doesn’t have to change for me. But he, on the other hand, changed me – he began to control me. He had hurt me physically, verbally and emotionally – but I allowed it. I thought that that was the love I deserve.
He broke up with me last year saying I was not the one for him. I was depressed and sad because of this. I did not know that God is in works in my life. I did not acknowledge his blessings. Instead, I questioned God. I said “God, why am I feeling this way? Why did he Have to break up with me after all I have done? Why does it have to be me who is hurting when it is me who knows how to love unconditionally?” September of last year (2013), I joined the community CFC SINGLES FOR FAMILY AND LIFE – Antipolo district, thinking that I deserve to be in a group full of people that will inspire me.
Last February 28 to March 2, we attended WORLD SINGLES CONFERENCE in Batangas City. This experience answered all my questions to Him. It was like he was talking to me personally through every talks and witness sessions. I learned that I was wrong in loving my ex-boyfriend with all my heart without me being connected with God. God is the source of love and without him, I ran out empty. I have WITNESSED all kinds of love in the WSC and made me realize that there are a lot of people in my life who love me. I should have not surrounded my world to my ex-boyfriend. These are the answers that God gave me in WSC:
- God, why am I feeling this way? Because you would never turn to me without you having this feeling.
- Why did he Have to break up with me after all I have done? To let you admit to yourself that you are doing everything wrong.
- Why does it have to be me who is hurting when it is me who knows how to love unconditionally? People are hurting in different kinds of situation. This situation is yours to accept and learn from.
I reunited with God in the WSC. All the worship songs sung there was like my own words saying that “Yes Lord God. Your love really does not fail. It does not give up on me even though I disconnected myself with you. I thought I lost a part of me when my ex-boyfriend broke up with me. But now, with you Lord God, I am whole.”
There is one saying in the WSC that really struck to me. “I came to serve, not to be served”. I realized that now that I am with God, it is now my time to serve him by loving others, loving the people around me and spreading his love, words and teachings. Now I say “Yes God!” I am wholeheartedly committed to serving you.
I am heartbroken because I lost my boyfriend. – I am not ashamed of saying that sentence because if I am not, then where will I be now? God wouldn’t have found me.
Tags: catholic community, catholic community for singles, catholic group, catholic group for singles, cfc sfl, cfcsfl, committed servants weekend, God, jesus, jesus christ, prolife, prolife singles, singles for family and life